ANG SABI KO SA IYO

Bumalong ang dagta
Sa hiniwang kaymito.
Namuo sa talim
Ng kutsilyo ang ilang patak.
Diyan ako naiwan, mahal,
At hindi sa laman.

Benilda Santos

I live for this shit.

Old School is the New School

"You see Lainey, this is all we need. A couple of smokes, a cup of coffee, and a little bit of conversation. You and me and five bucks." - Troy Dyer

My idea of a good time :)

I Have No Title For This

A friend found this after googling for tattoo designs...

Fine. If I broke your heart, I probably deserve this distasteful design.

If it's the other way around, what's with the stars?

If I caused any breakup, please insert "Trey" in between the broken heart. The message is clearer that way.

If, for some reason, I inspired this design, please shoot me now.

Harhar.

Spero

"Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance." - Robert F. Kennedy

This Is Hardcore

Found this excerpt from the book, "Nicanor Abelardo: The Man and the Artist, A Biography" by Ernesto V. Epistola. My dad showed it to me to let me know that we are actually "Abelardos," and that the surname "Ajusto" is an evolved version of the former. And that we are indeed, hardcore Indios.

"In time, Maria Henson became the wife of Apolinario Abelardo.

But in those days, the family carried a hyphenated name, Abelardo-Justo. There was a story told that earlier in the Spanish times, the clan carried a Kapampangan-sounding name. They had defied the Spanish authorities by refusing to plant their quota of tobacco. They became outlaws because of the unjust Tobacco Laws imposed on the Filipinos by Spain. They went to the mountains in hiding. When they returned to the town, they thought it would be safer to change their name so they chose Abelardo. And to emphasize that they had always been righteous and just people, they added Justo to Abelardo, hence the hyphenated name. Later, it was shortened to A. Justo. It is interesting to note that this is the surname of Nicanor as it appears in the registry of the parish church in San Miguel. But it was in the generation that came after Apolinario Abelardo that the evolution of the name was completed." (p.5)

This also confirms that I am officially related to a rock god.

Caruncho Avenue Blues 1

Lumaki ako sa Caruncho Avenue. Sa tabi ng palengke. Sa likod ng mga squatters. Sa harapan ng sakayan ng dyip. Katabi ng Bernie's Salon at Del Carmen Pawnshop.

Tuwing lumalabas ako ng aming pintuan noong ako ay nag-aaral ng kinder maging hanggang high school, lagi akong sinasalubong at binabati ni Mang Maning. "Hello, Teresa!" Hanggang ngayon, hindi ko alam kung paano niya nalaman ang aking pangalan. Isa syang pamilyar na mukha sa aming kalsada. Mababatid sya ng iba bilang isang taong-grasa.

Bahain ang lugar namin dati. May panahon pa nga na kinailangan kong mamangka papuntang bayan para lang makasakay sa aming Toyota Tamaraw papuntang Poveda. Tatay ko pa nga yung gumawa ng aming bangka, na yari sa kahoy at yero. Ginagamit din nila iyon para makarating sa aming pwesto sa dry goods section ng palengke araw-araw.

Parati kaming namimisikleta sa park ng aking kapatid, o di kaya'y naglalaro sa palaruan. Paborito namin yung malaking pugita sa gitna na maraming padulasan. Wala kaming pakialam kahit marumihan ang mga pwet namin sa kakadulas sa pugitang iyon. Kaya pa nga naming tiisin yung paso sa aming mga binti at kamay na resulta ng madalas na pagkaskas ng aming mga balat sa mainit na kongkreto ng padulasan.

Hindi ko makakalimutan yung jukebox sa kainan sa gitna ng park. Hindi ko mawari kung bakit lagi akong natatakot lapitan yung makinang iyon. Siguro dahil tuwing pinapatugtog siya, abot hanggang bahay namin ang lakas ng kanyang tunog. Siguro rin dahil masyado akong nalunod sa pagkakumplikado ng makinarya nya para lamang makatugtog ng isang kanta. Piso lang ang katapat para marinig ang "Karma Chameleon" o "Bawal Na Gamot." Isang beses lang ako naghulog ng piso. "Like A Virgin" ang kanta.

Dalawang sorbetero ang rumoronda sa aming kalsada. Dirty ice cream sa umaga at Magnolia sa hapon. Tsokolate ang kadalasang pinapakiusapan ko sa sorbetero ng dirty ice cream. Matindi naman ang tama sa akin ng Magnolia, dahil bihira ko lang sya bilhin at kadalasan, kinakailangan ko pang kumbinsihin ang tagapag-alaga kong si Ate Ester na bilhan ako ng Pinipig Crunch, o kung papalarin, ng Drumstick. De padyak pa ang karitela ng Magnolia noon. Hindi pa uso ang background music. Sa kalembang o tililing pa lang ng maliit na kampana, napapatakbo na ako sa aming harapan upang salubungin ang mga sorbeterong tila di napapagod sa kaiikot sa aming lugar.

[Abangan ang susunod na kabanata]

3D Christmas Trees Are Badass...Especially When Crocheted

Instead of making a doily or a coaster for my crocheting project for home eco in high school, I decided to make a 3-dimensional christmas tree. If I were to gruel over making loops over hooks, why not make it badass...right? Well, a 3d christmas tree isn't exactly badass. There were other more badass options like a zebra stuffed toy or a bikini. (Fine, save for a few coasters I gave away to classmates who got high grades for them, in exchange for the acknowledgment of being the best crocheter alive, of course).

See, I was that good that my teacher even accused me of having my project done by somebody else. She can't fathom the idea that a high school student can have bragging rights for crocheting excellence. It's not just for 'em spinsters and grandmas you know (that, of course, is not a good sign for me). I should have threatened her with my middle finger, which developed a calluse on the left side from too much "crochet hook hard pressing."

I like the intricacy involved with crochet. I like creating something out of nothing. I like the rhythm that goes with every pull of the thread and with every swing of the hook. I like the inconsistencies between every stitch. I like it when I get lost somewhere in the middle. I like it more when I find what went wrong and figure out how to fix it. I like the idea of making something and making it your own. I like it even more when I give it to others. I like it when my fingers get tired and I find a reason to continue and finish what I've started. I like how every project starts with an insignificant knot and ends with a purpose.

You see, I'm badass that way.